Male Survivors

Male survivors may feel isolated because there is little understanding about the sexual abuse of boys and adult men.

It is usually males who sexually abuse boys or men, but it can be females as well. Savana can offer counselling with either male or female counsellors, depending on who you would feel more comfortable with.

Effects of long-term abuse

The effects of long-term sexual abuse are similar to those of people who have experienced severe trauma including: depression, anxiety, self-esteem issues, problems with relationships and sexuality, aggression, addictions, social and emotional withdrawal, suicide, abuse of others and self-harm.

Employment and unemployment

You may find it hard at work or to keep a job. You may have problems with people in authority as a result of the abuse of power that you experienced between you and your abuser. You may also find it hard to relate to others in the work place.

Substance abuse and addictions

You may use either of these to avoid the hurt and pain. These can lead to health problems, difficulties at home or at work. You may subsequently lose your job or experience a breakdown of your relationships.

Anger Management

In terms of culture, men can feel uncomfortable in expressing emotions such as guilt, fear, vulnerability or shame. These are the main feelings that men can experience after sexual abuse but anger may be used to convey or hide these emotions.

Sexual Confusion

When you were abused you may have felt aroused and this can cause feelings of confusion regarding your sexuality. Feeling aroused is a normal physical reaction to attention or affection, even when it happens within the context of abuse. You may have anxieties about masculinity which may be increased by the stereotype that ‘real men’ don’t get abused, especially if the abuse happened to you as an adult. In addition,  any needs for emotional fulfilment may have been met to some extent by the abuse and therefore sex may be seen as one way to meet that need.

Physical and Emotional Symptoms

Symptoms you may experience include: frequent nightmares, agitation, difficulty in using public toilets, depression, fear in the presence of seemingly more aggressive men, issues with trust and being intimate, fear that you may abuse children and being over-protective with your own children.